Whenever someone says, "you had it coming", it means you got what you deserved, just deserts, all that. I'd venture to guess the speaker would be feeling a bit smug. You might even witness a little nod of satisfaction to punctuate their verdict.
I don't remember ever consciously saying that kind of thing out loud. Maybe I've thought it. I try not to. It's so...punitive. I want to believe I can move past these terminal stops, find a juncture, not just "it" and its predictable arrival. I'd like to think that when "it" gets here it will bring with it some new possibilities.
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